‘Baby It’s Cold Outside’ is, Actually, a Date Rape Song

Baby It’s Cold Outside: it really is an insanely catchy, Christmas-themed date rape song. That we sang in seventh grade chorus. Ponder this:

“The neighbors might think (Baby it’s bad out there)
Say what’s in this drink? (No cabs to be had out there)
I wish I knew how (Your eyes are like starlight now)
To break this spell (I’ll take your hat, your hair looks swell) (Why thank you)
I ought to say no, no, no sir (Mind if move in closer?)
At least I’m gonna say that I tried (What’s the sense of hurtin’ my pride?)
I really can’t stay (Baby don’t hold out)
Baby it’s cold outside”

Nothing like fresh-faced middle-schoolers singing about roofies. No need to ban it, but we should own what it is: a catchy song with loads of references to date rape. Of course, our bell choir director had us do a kickin’ bell rendition of Ring My Bell, too. I hope she was a closet subversive and not simply completely clueless.

3 thoughts on “‘Baby It’s Cold Outside’ is, Actually, a Date Rape Song

  1. Get over yourself. You complain about this, but not Santa, Baby? Why? Because the woman is the aggressor/manipulator in Santa Baby? Every hear the Lady Gaga/Joseph Gordon Levitt version of Baby It’s Cold Outside? How about Jimmy Buffett’s? He just wants to go home to his dog.

    And what about a woman’s choice to stay?

    STFU.

    Sent from my iPhone

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    • Well, Brianne, what a delightful creature you are. As it happens, I loathe Santa, Baby, not so much because it plays on ridiculous stereotypes, but because it’s just a really shitty song. I cannot say I have enjoyed the musical stylings of Lady Gaga and Joseph Gordon Levitt, but it doesn’t change my opinion any that this ancient relic of a Christmas song is an ode to date rape, kind of like Sixteen Candles was which I really liked back in high school. I don’t see a ton of people out there defending the timelessness of “N*gger in A Wood Pile” by Gid Tanner from back in the day, no matter how catchy that fiddle riff is. Times change, and you don’t see ads for the “Ancient Chinese Secret” of Whisk anymore, do you? So perhaps this little date rape ditty should be recognized for what is is – a song from back in the day that has a really catchy tune but isn’t exactly a beacon of progress, either. Also, if Jimmy Buffett is singing about drugging his dog’s drink, we have other problems. Thanks for your charming stop by my little page to share your regressive thoughts.

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